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The Story of the Skating Goose - cellophane
the story of an invisible girl
renniekins
renniekins
The Story of the Skating Goose
As most of my local friends (and some of my non-local friends) know, I have a goose. This is Harriet. As soon as I bought my house, I wanted to get a goose. A nice goose made of concrete that I could dress up.

I love dress-up geese. I realize that they are basically the epitome of suburban tackiness, and perhaps that is precisely why I love them so. Their very ridiculousness amuses me. It's silly; it's fun.

It took me awhile to find one, surprisingly enough! I guess they are less popular now than they once were. But I finally found my lovely Harriet, and shortly afterward I bought her two outfits at a craft store. (The yellow rain slicker she is wearing here is one of them. The summer outfit she is wearing today is the other.)

After I bought the two outfits, the craft store went out of business. When I wanted new outfits, I had to make them for her myself. I made do, scavenging clothes from stuffed animals, scalping a stuffed witch for a Halloween costume, and even pulling out my rusting crocheting skills to make her a winter cap and scarf.

As with many silly traditions, my friends got involved. There is a long a complicated story about a "midnight stoning" involving The Incredible Shrinking Librarian, and a vacation retaliation wherein Harriet lost a lot of her innocence. Other friends have helped dress her up over the years, and her collection of outfits has grown enormously.

One of the cooler surprises involving Harriet has to be just a few months ago, when I arrived home from my vacation after having won the synchro national championships. I climbed out of my car, travel-weary, burdened down by luggage, and approached my front door. There on the porch was Harriet, proudly wearing a miniature version of my skating dress! She also had a tiny gold medal around her neck! What a neat surprise to come home to.

It took me a short while to figure out who was responsible for her new outfit. At first I suspected my girlfriends who had participated in the prior goose-escapades. They said they hadn't done anything though, so I quickly realized it must have been my wonderful catsitter along with his lovely-yet-devious wife. Upon being confronted, they confessed to the deed.

Harriet changed into her red-white-and-blue frock for Memorial Day, and she continued to wear it through Independence Day. After Independence Day had passed, I had a brainstorm. I brought Harriet in from the porch, then I climbed back into my competition dress and put on my medal. Then I dressed Harriet back up in her dress -- she was still wearing her medal, being too proud to take it off. Then she and I posed for several pictures together.

The photos made a great present for my cat-sitters/goose-dressers, not to mention a fun memory for me.
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Comments
From: davidp5382 Date: July 18th, 2004 08:08 pm (UTC) (Link)
Very nice! The two of you look *so* cute together!
the_macross From: the_macross Date: July 18th, 2004 09:01 pm (UTC) (Link)
ok now THAT is funny.

lahabiel From: lahabiel Date: July 18th, 2004 09:08 pm (UTC) (Link)

*honk*

I want to see the witch outfit! :)
renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 19th, 2004 07:47 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: *honk*

I don't have any pics on my harddrive, so you're going to have to wait until October....sorry!
hannunvaakuna From: hannunvaakuna Date: July 18th, 2004 10:22 pm (UTC) (Link)
hehehehe this post inspired me to look up this old post and this old post, too. i never did get the pictures...i wonder if they're on the disposable cameras i still haven't used up!
renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 19th, 2004 07:48 am (UTC) (Link)
heeheehee!
cannibal From: cannibal Date: July 19th, 2004 07:13 am (UTC) (Link)
Gabe & Audrey rock. I particularly liked "lovely-yet-devious wife". It may even replace "She who must be obeyed" in my mind as an Audrey-description.
renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 19th, 2004 08:16 pm (UTC) (Link)
Yep, they're awesome. (: It's apt, isn't it?
figure_skater From: figure_skater Date: July 19th, 2004 11:40 am (UTC) (Link)
Haha that's great! I don't have a goose, as well uh....I don't have a porch!
But I do have a stuffed moose that is wearing a replica of my long program fairy dress from '03. My friend Wendy made it for me for Christmas that year. I'll try to post a pic soon, I don't have one on my computer right now. :)
renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 19th, 2004 02:49 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh that must be so cute! Yes, definitely post a picture, I'd love to see it. How cute.

I have a moose christmas tree ornament from '97, my first year on the team, and it's wearing our dress from that year. Somebody was selling them.
figure_skater From: figure_skater Date: July 20th, 2004 01:04 am (UTC) (Link)
I will definitely try to post a pic soon!
Oh, and I have the Christmas tree moose ornaments too! You can still get them, Mrs. Tuma makes them. I forget how much she charges but I have 4 moose ornaments from the 4 Team Elan programs I've skated (2 shorts and 2 longs). They're so cute and a great memento from the year.
radiantsoul From: radiantsoul Date: July 19th, 2004 02:01 pm (UTC) (Link)
Lookin' good!
_goodintentions From: _goodintentions Date: July 19th, 2004 06:48 pm (UTC) (Link)
I love that dress its so beautiful.


I don't have any beautiful dresses.
renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 19th, 2004 08:14 pm (UTC) (Link)
Don't worry, I've had lots of nasty dresses to make up for it. Look at this one, our butts were always sticking out of it!
http://www.sk8stuffmore.com/sync01/pics_teams_adult/adu02a480s.jpg

This is the prettiest dress I've had in 8 years of doing synchro, so your time will come.
_goodintentions From: _goodintentions Date: July 19th, 2004 08:18 pm (UTC) (Link)
http://www.photoreflect.com/scripts/prsm.dll?eventorder?photo=03BZ01KO120010&start=0&album=0&adjust=-1

Yes, well look at that. Ew.
P.S. I'm the one in the last row with the glasses.
renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 20th, 2004 09:57 pm (UTC) (Link)
Yeah, I understand...way too "cutsy" to be pretty.
_goodintentions From: _goodintentions Date: July 20th, 2004 09:57 pm (UTC) (Link)
They're so ugly.

We looked like clowns.
retepsnave From: retepsnave Date: July 20th, 2004 09:44 am (UTC) (Link)
you are both way too cute!!!

:-)
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