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Spider - cellophane
the story of an invisible girl
renniekins
renniekins
Spider
I walk into the downstairs bathroom. "ACK!!!"

"What's wrong," he calls from upstairs.

"There is a big spider in the sink!"

"Did you kill it?"

"I mean a really big spider. It's huge!"

"Did you kill it?"

"Not yet, I can't touch that thing. I need paper towels, a lot of paper towels. A newspaper. Maybe a phonebook... and a bowling ball. It's a really big spider."

"Do you need me to help?"

"Yes, please bring a bowling ball."

...he comes downstairs...

"Wow."

"I told you it was big."

"That's okay, I'm bigger." He turns on the water faucet and starts splashing water on it. As it drowns, it shrivels up to a more reasonable size. I realize he is going to wash it down the drain.

"Wait, you can't just wash it down the drain, because it could crawl right back out - and then it'd be pissed. Didn't you bring something heavy to squish it?"

"I can just squish it with toilet paper."

"Eeeew, no, get a softball, or use your shoe!"

...squish...

...I flinch and look away, only looking back when I hear the sound of flushing...

"Did you see how big it was? That was no ordinary spider; I could have squished an ordinary spider."

"Okay, I'll admit, that was a big spider."

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replyhazy From: replyhazy Date: September 20th, 2011 03:44 pm (UTC) (Link)
That reminds me of many many years ago, when I was a teenager:

"Mom! There's a spider on my wall!"

"So? Kill it!"

"But it's really BIG!" (Body of spider as big as my thumbnail)

"Oh, how big can it -- OH!"

"Well?"

"Get your father."
johnridley From: johnridley Date: September 20th, 2011 09:43 pm (UTC) (Link)
I has a sad for the spider.
At our house we generally leave them alone, unless they're a type that would be clearly happier outside (and it's summer). At other people's houses I generally transport them outside before someone else kills them.
renniekins From: renniekins Date: September 21st, 2011 12:51 am (UTC) (Link)
I allow bugs in the wild to live no problem ,that's their home. But if they come into my home then they generally lose that privilege.
nishar From: nishar Date: September 21st, 2011 09:41 am (UTC) (Link)
You are a brave woman. So that spider had to be HUGE!
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