October 30th, 2002


Coffee Shop Anecdote

A few years back, I had a quiet night to myself and decided to spend it relaxing with a book in a local coffee shop. I had settled onto a corner of a couch with my caramel latte and was comfortably reading away, when a largish group of people came in. The place was already somewhat full, and there was nowhere for them to sit except for my couch. One of the girls politely asked if I minded, which I didn't, so they sat down.

A bald guy ended up sitting next to me, and we struck up a conversation. He was asking me what kind of drink to order. "I want something orgasmicly chocolaty," he told me.

He went on to explain that he had always wondered what the female orgasm was like, and he was striving to find out. He thought if he could find the right combination of chocolate and such, perhaps he could experience one. He'd had some really good taste experiences, but he wasn't sure yet if he'd achieved the elusive orgasm or not.

"Well," I told him, "let me tell you what I tell all the strangers I meet in coffee shops who ask me about orgasms. Once when I was younger, I wondered if I'd experienced an orgasm or not. I mean, I'd read about them, and I'd read descriptions of how it feels and so forth, but I couldn't really tell, you know? The words didn't translate well enough into sensations, and I just wasn't sure if they described something I'd experienced or not. I'd had a lot of fun, and done some things that had made me feel very good, but were they orgasmic? Had I had one?

"Then my friend....then I had one. And I knew, without any doubt, that I'd just experienced one. From then on I knew what they were, what they felt like. So here is what I believe: if you have to ask, it hasn't happened yet."

He thanked me for my advice. He went back to talking with his friends, and I went back to reading my book. Unfortunately, it turned out that the coffee drink he'd selected wasn't chocolaty enough, so I'm afraid he left the shop that night still searching, still wondering.