February 22nd, 2006


This Day

I'm not very happy today. I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm sad, just...unhappy. There's a difference, I think.

I'm not entirely sure why. Perhaps it's because I had a blah day yesterday, followed by an emotionally stressful evening. Perhaps it's because I slept very poorly last night. Perhaps it's because work is frustrating this week, and I don't have anything challenging to work on. Perhaps it's because I still don't feel entirely healthy, with a lingering thread of pain running from under my jaw to my right ear.

Or perhaps it's just that I'm having a "day", not a great day, not a terrible day, just a day. I read once that it may be a uniquely Modern American thing, this feeling that we should be Happy all the time. Nobody is happy all the time.

Whatever the cause, I feel very tired and mopey today. I'd like to be alone, or at least not at work. Maybe having a nap with a cat or two.

I'm currently hiding out in my car. I didn't feel like driving anywhere for my lunch break, but I walked across the street for a sandwich. I walked back and ate it here, sprawling in the pushed-back driver's seat with a CD playing and the windows cracked. It's a sunny day today, and the slight breeze feels good.

I like it here. This alone-time helps. Too bad I have to go back to the real world soon. On the plus side, the day won't last forever. They never do.