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Taking Care of Myself - cellophane — LiveJournal
the story of an invisible girl
Taking Care of Myself
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From: caneprints Date: April 29th, 2004 08:18 pm (UTC) (Link)
This is a fascinating subject and one I think about a lot. I consider myself very humble, and I always score very low on assertiveness tests. I always thought humility was a good thing, perhaps because I was raised in a somewhat religious environment, but one day I was researching something on the internet and came across this article from a human resources magazine where they said that interviewers should not hire people who did not sell themselves well and basically brag about how wonderful they were. It made me realize that humility is really not valued at all, and was in fact a liability. And now, as I think about my own work environment, I realize that the people who get ahead are the aggressive, narcissistic, bragging types who always look important and busy, even if they really aren't. I am also always criticized for basically not being able to stand up for myself and take control of things. But the truth is that nobody knows what a surviver we both are, the things we've dealt with and how hard we've worked to get where we are. We just don't brag about it, flaunting our achievements and successes all over the place looking for compliments. One time a therapist made me sit down and write down all the things I've accomplished in my life and what it took to get through the tough times I've had, and I was like, wait a minute, is this really me? Did I actually survive all this stuff, without much help from anybody and often without the basic tools everyone else takes for granted? Sure, I didn't use bullets or fists or scathing words, but in a quiet and subtle but powerful way, I've gotten around obstacles and broken through barriers just by sheer intellect, hard work and sometimes cunning. Maybe a little more assertiveness would do us both good, but as for the question of whether we can take care of ourselves? Well it sounds to me like we've taken care of ourselves just fine, but like the song says, we did it our way. Sorry for the long comment, but this subject hits home for me in a big way and writing about it has been truly therapeutic.
read 20 comments | talk to me!