alpaca princess (renniekins) wrote,
alpaca princess

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In which I embarrass myself

Here's the thing. As I walked into the bathroom, I realized that I had a ballpoint pen in my back pocket. I worried that if I left it in the pocket, there was a good chance of it wiggling its way out of my pocket and falling onto the floor or (worse yet) into the toilet.

So I pulled it out of my pocket, but then I didn't know where to put it. I needed my hands free to take care of unfastening my pants and such. I didn't have any shirt pockets, and the clip had broken off, so I couldn't just clip it to my clothing. For some reason it didn't occur to me to just set it on the tissue dispenser. Instead, I stuck it into my bra.

There I sat, the pen wedged precariously in the front of my bra. It wasn't a very good place for it, but I figured it would work until I could put it back into my pocket when I'd finished. It worked fine for awhile, until I leaned forward to begin standing up.

You guessed it -- I felt it slip, I heard a chink, then I heard what I'd most feared: a dreaded splut. I stood up and looked around to see the pen floating in the bowl.

I stared at it. There was an fraction of a second where I wondered what to do, then the decision was made for me. The toilets in my office building are "hands free", you see, and when I stood up the toilet began flushing all on its own. Before I could do anything, the pen was sucked down.

It disappeared without a trace. I stood there helplessly for a good 60 seconds, staring at the fresh bowl, fully expecting the pen to come bobbing back up. It didn't.

I'm amazed that the plumbing was strong enough to completely swallow a fairly large ballpoint pen (unfortunately one of my favorites, I might add). I hope it doesn't damage anything -- but even if the toilet does clog up, I probably won't be admitting that it was my fault.
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