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Little stories to tell - cellophane — LiveJournal
the story of an invisible girl
Little stories to tell
I stopped for cookies when I was at a mall last week. I ordered two m&m cookies. The salesgirl looked directly at me with wide worried eyes and asked, "Will you need a drink?" She really amused me, because it didn't seem like a conditioned ya-want-fries-with-that question. Instead, it sounded like she was genuinely concerned about the kind of thirst I would probably suffer after eating two m&m cookies.

My cat-hammock is broken. The ends are collapsed, so it doesn't cradle a cat properly anymore. My cats determinedly sit in it anyway, lying across the short width so they won't fall out, huddled up by the window where the unbroken part is.

In Muskegon, I saw a sign advertising a chili dog. The text read: It's meat sauce, on top of meat. Is this a great country, or what?

I saw an old man the other day who was missing most of one hand. He had his entire thumb, and he had the "heel" of his hand, but all the fingers and the top of the hand were gone. Thus the bottom section of the thumb, which is usually hidden in one's hand, was exposed. It made his thumb look incredibly long, like he had a flexible multi-jointed tentacle sticking right out of his wrist. Talk about creepy but fascinating! It was all I could do not to stare rudely or approach for a better look.

The other night, I was suffering from one of my tunafish cravings. I don't know where these come from (maybe feline ancestry?), but every now and then I just really need a tunafish sandwich. On toasted bread, with crunchy lettuce or celery. The next afternoon I finally went for a walk to a local diner and fulfilled it.

Walking home, I stopped for an ice cream sundae. As I was walking away, a guy was walking up. He saw my sundae and said, "Wow, that looks good!"

"I hope so," I replied. He told the kid at the window he wanted what I was having, so I told the kid, "Hot fudge sundae with caramel sauce." (I didn't mention that I'd gotten mine with frozen yogurt, in a futile attempt to pretend I was being healthy. I didn't think he was a frozen-yogurt kind of guy.)

I sat at a picnic table in the sun to eat my treat, then I started to walk home. I passed the guy, who was sitting in his truck eating his sundae. He told me, "You were right, this is good. Thanks for the recommendation!"

I joked, "You're welcome...that's what I'm here for."

"How about breakfast recommendations?"

I paused, squinched my face thoughtfully, then said, "I like omelets."

I was about to continue by directing him to my favorite omelet place, when he asked, "Will you be making it?"

I paused, startled. Oh! This was a different sort of conversation than I'd realized, and he was not the kind of guy I was interested in having it with. "No..." I told him. He started to ask why, but gave him a friendly wave. "Have a great evening!" And I turned on me heel and walked away. As I walked, I listened carefully for the sound of his car behind me... I was slightly relieved not to hear it starting.
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specialagentm From: specialagentm Date: July 16th, 2004 09:48 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh... so that pickup line doesn't work, eh?

[ Checks that off his list ]


So, I have to ask... how exactly were you eating that sundae? Were there perhaps some moans of delight accompanying it? Somehow this guy got the wrong idea entirely! :-)
bob_the_mighty From: bob_the_mighty Date: July 16th, 2004 09:52 am (UTC) (Link)

I think it was the fact that she actually SPOKE with him that did it!

Possible thought that went through ice-cream man's head:
"OMGs... she MUST like me.. she TALKED to me!!!"


specialagentm From: specialagentm Date: July 16th, 2004 09:59 am (UTC) (Link)
Yeah, that must be it.

New rule for you, rennie: No talking to strange men.

That is, new strange men. You can keep talking to the strange guys you already know, because otherwise you'd lose all your current male friends. :-).
renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 16th, 2004 10:07 am (UTC) (Link)
Yeah, that's exactly it: I made the mistake of being friendly.

But how will I meet Mr Right if I can't talk to strange men?
specialagentm From: specialagentm Date: July 16th, 2004 10:10 am (UTC) (Link)
I think that's how you've been meeting Mr. Wrong, isn't it? :-)
operatic From: operatic Date: July 16th, 2004 11:55 am (UTC) (Link)

I made the mistake of being friendly.

More specifically: Friendly While Cute [FWC]. Same thing that wait-staff have to put up with. ;)
bob_the_mighty From: bob_the_mighty Date: July 16th, 2004 12:26 pm (UTC) (Link)


"OMGs... they brought me a refuill for my Coke.. they LOVE me!!"

Small wonder a lot of waitstaff wear nametags that have a different name on them, eh?

renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 17th, 2004 09:09 am (UTC) (Link)
hm, maybe I should learn to be friendly or cute, but never both?

It's hard being a girl! (: (:
cannibal From: cannibal Date: July 19th, 2004 06:58 am (UTC) (Link)
Speak for yourself (and me, and... well, hmm.) yes, but I'm strange in a good way, whereas the rest of you guys are strange in a scary way! "Everyone's mad but me and thee and I'm not too sure about thee!"
renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 16th, 2004 10:08 am (UTC) (Link)
Yup, I'm afraid you're probably right! Shame on me for being friendly... (:
anderale From: anderale Date: July 16th, 2004 10:48 am (UTC) (Link)
It makes me sad that he ruined what was completely cute and innocent with a stupid pick up line. dumbass.

The cookies sound good and I think I will go to the mall today for one! yum!
renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 16th, 2004 12:39 pm (UTC) (Link)
The cookies were really good, even though I refused a drink! (I had liquids at home, where I was heading)
specialagentm From: specialagentm Date: July 16th, 2004 11:06 am (UTC) (Link)
Somehow, I don't think you can avoid being friendly. We all have to follow our own nature, even if stupid people occasionally ruin our attempts :-).
greyyguy From: greyyguy Date: July 16th, 2004 11:14 am (UTC) (Link)
Muskegon is weird. I'm sure the meat sauce on meat concept was a new thing for the town.

I'll remember not to use the asking-you-to-make-breakfast approach when I talk to ya. Unless I am the kind of guy you are interested in having that conversation with, of course ;)
guingel From: guingel Date: July 16th, 2004 05:22 pm (UTC) (Link)
sorry to rennie for the spam, but--I have the same Cthulhu plush. :D He's a great conversation piece, I've found.
greyyguy From: greyyguy Date: July 16th, 2004 05:26 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh- I'm sure she doesn't mind the spam. It gives her something interesting to read :)

The plush C'thulhu is pretty cool. I have mine sitting next to the computer to guard against minor bugs.
renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 17th, 2004 09:05 am (UTC) (Link)
Doesn't bother me....you guys are always welcome to chat among yourselves here. (:
joline From: joline Date: July 16th, 2004 05:36 pm (UTC) (Link)
ok, well, since YOU brought it up.... you know, people with deformities/amputations/whatever....


i know what you mean! it's perfectly natural to be curious, but we all have to pretend that we're not! there is a guy who lives in pittsburgh who only goes down to his nipples. this is not an exagerration. he has a head, an upper chest, and arms. no legs or lower torso. (now that i think about it, he must have a ribcage, but that's it.) the first time i saw him, i did a double-take because i thought he was standing in a manhole... but he was inside a Kinko's, and they don't have manholes there. he was waiting in line. when the line moved, he put his hands on the ground, pushed himself up, and walked forward, on his hands.

so, okay, how do you not stare at this? how do you not die to know the answers to the following questions: a) when he eats, where does the food go? b) how does the food come out? and most importantly, c) how does this happen to a person?

i've seen him a couple times now. you don't forget a guy like that.
greyyguy From: greyyguy Date: July 16th, 2004 08:29 pm (UTC) (Link)
As scary as it is, I know what you mean. My dad loves Jerry Springer and tapes the show. One of them he made me watch had a guy find out his girlfriend was cheating on him with a guy like that. There was a camera man with him hunting his girlfriend down in the hotel and they burst into the room to find this guy there walking on his hands and he was chasing the boyfriend through the hotel. It was amazing to watch! The guy could jump up on tables and walk using his hands. They never explained what happened to him that made him that way (or how the woman was cheating on her boyfriend with him) but it was fascinating to watch him move around.
renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 17th, 2004 09:04 am (UTC) (Link)
Wow. That's really amazing....I didn't think a person could live without at least a full torso! I definitely wouldn't be able to help watching him walk like that. And how did he get to the counter-height, or did he just toss his documents up? Utterly fascinating. Somebody should do a documentary on such people, so we can stare all we want without being impolite.
cannibal From: cannibal Date: July 19th, 2004 07:01 am (UTC) (Link)
Did you feel that you had a real, deep, emotional connection with the girl who works at the cookie shop?

Were you just being evil directing the strange man to the omelet place which has been closed for a month now?!?
renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 19th, 2004 07:50 am (UTC) (Link)
Real, deep, emotional...yet very brief.

Actually it's reopened under a new name, and when I cautiously visited it, they seem to have the same menu. So it's more-or-less kinda the same place.

(OT: it's always a pleasure to see you reading my journal again. (: )
cannibal From: cannibal Date: July 20th, 2004 08:03 am (UTC) (Link)
Thx. Am v. glad for you, favorite resto reopened in manner of phoenix rising from ashes.
renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 20th, 2004 01:00 pm (UTC) (Link)
Okay Bridget!
netmouse From: netmouse Date: July 19th, 2004 07:50 am (UTC) (Link)
cat-hammock. That seems like the perfect gift for my sister... where could I get one, do you know?

renniekins From: renniekins Date: July 19th, 2004 08:01 am (UTC) (Link)
Here is an example of the one I have. I know these are sold in some of those big pet supply stores too...I honestly don't remember if I got it there or online, nor how much I paid for it. It was awhile ago. My sister has one too. The cats love it.
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