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I told you I was sleepy - cellophane — LiveJournal
the story of an invisible girl
I told you I was sleepy
Yesterday I became progressively more exhausted and unfocused as the day went on. Finally, I decided to leave work an hour and a half early. My stomach was upset, my head hurt, I could barely keep my eyes open, and I couldn't concentrate worth beans. I figured that I wasn't getting anything at all done, so why bother staying?

I stopped at the drug store and picked up some stuff my house was needing -- toilet paper, soap, etc. Then I went home, put stuff away and such, and turned on the television. I lay there on the couch for awhile, my face squished against a pillow, watching sitcom reruns. Then I watched half of The Wedding Singer before I got sick of it. I turned off the television.

I glanced at my email and friends page for a bit, then decided it was time to go read in bed. I remember it was 10:15pm when I lay down with my book. Bear in mind that my usual bedtime is around midnight. I did read for a little while...not sure how long.

I woke up around 5am. My thought process went something like this: "Huh, 5am. Yay, that means it's not time to get up, I can sleep longer. [look around] Wait a minute...why is my light on? Wait, I'm still wearing socks -- I hate wearing socks in bed! Huh. I must have fallen asleep reading. Strange, I don't remember even deciding to close my eyes, and here it's 5 o'clock... [look around again] If I was reading, where is my book? [dig around the bed] Oh, here it is, under the pillow! Good thing the book's not bent."

I often read in bed. Since I tend to have a lot of trouble falling asleep, sometimes I will try to "sneak up" on the elusive sleep. For example, I'll read until I'm very tired and the words are blurry, then I'll intentionally set the book down and take off my eyeglasses. But I won't put anything away, the book and glasses are still on the bed right in front of my pillow. I'll close my eyes and tell myself I'm just resting "for a moment". It's like this: if I plan to fall asleep, I'll often be unable, but if I tell myself I'm just closing my eyes for a moment, still planning to pick up the book again and read some more in a few minutes, sometimes I will fall asleep. Sometimes it doesn't work, and I do just pick up my book a few minutes later and continue reading, but sometimes I actually doze off. Usually not for very long, maybe a half hour, but when I awake I'm usually drowsey enough to go to sleep for real. I'll put the book away, turn off the light, and sleep for most of the night.

The odd thing is though: I don't remember doing that last night, and generally I do remember. I don't remember setting the book down at all! I think, possibly, this time I really did fall asleep while I was reading it. Kind of strange, because it's very rare for sleep to sneak up on me -- usually I have to sneak up on it.

At any rate, when I woke up this morning at 5am, I put my book away, peeled off my clothes, turned off the light, and went back to sleep after a short while of shifting around in the dark trying to get comfortable again. I slept until 9am this morning. 9am!! And I was still tired: I wanted to go back to sleep, except that I was supposed to be at work (um, I'm afraid my start time is also 9am). I must have been really wiped out yesterday, even more than I'd realized.

Current Mood: awake

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endogenousardor From: endogenousardor Date: October 8th, 2002 07:49 am (UTC) (Link)
"because it's very rare for sleep to sneak up on me -- usually I have to sneak up on it."

What a wonderful way to describe a situation that I'm learning a lot of us share.
renniekins From: renniekins Date: October 8th, 2002 11:12 am (UTC) (Link)
Thanks! Yeah...it does seem like there are a lot of us out there....I did an interest search on insomnia, and it stopped listing people after 1000.
endogenousardor From: endogenousardor Date: October 8th, 2002 11:39 am (UTC) (Link)


It never occured to me to list insomnia as an interest. Obviously, it's of interest to me, but it's not something that follows the "I like... " convention for listing interests.
renniekins From: renniekins Date: October 8th, 2002 02:07 pm (UTC) (Link)


I found it on somebody else's interest list (probably late at night, heh), and thought to myself, "Yes, that's of interest to me too!" So I added it. That's where most of my interests came from, aside from my initial dozen, either something I saw elsewhere, or a thought that got stuck in my mind.
radiantsoul From: radiantsoul Date: October 8th, 2002 08:43 am (UTC) (Link)
The Wedding Singer is a great film, I don't know how you could have got bored of it! I have seen it quite a few times.

Hope you are less tired today.
renniekins From: renniekins Date: October 8th, 2002 11:14 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh, I've seen it several times myself. I like the movie too! Problem is that it was on network television, and the commercials were driving me crazy. Since I'd seen the movie before, the movie's allure wasn't enough to make me willing to survive the commercials any longer.

Yes, I'm feeling much more awake today, thanks. (:
prader From: prader Date: October 8th, 2002 08:49 am (UTC) (Link)
I sooooooo know exactly what you are talking about.
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